


Out of Character

by OccasionalStorytelling



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: F/F, Jock AU, M/M, Slow Burn, i like the concept of Evan having a varsity jacket and Connor stealing it to wear all the time, out of character sort of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-18
Updated: 2017-04-27
Packaged: 2018-10-20 11:11:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10661373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OccasionalStorytelling/pseuds/OccasionalStorytelling
Summary: Out of character DEH au in which evan is a buff student athlete and Connor is head cheerleader





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Based on an idea created by gayradwhitedad and stellaisgay on tumblr-thanks for putting an awesome concept into the world!

“Come on, Hansen!” Somebody yelled. Evan blinked his eyes ad did his best to focus. He was the captain of the school football team, and it was his job not to let things like this distract him. His vision filled with spots. He wished he wasn’t on the field. He needed his inhaler.

“HANSEN!” The same guy yelled. Evan’s vision went black for a moment and he stumbled to the side. An opposing team member slammed into him and he went down, landing hard on his arm. He couldn’t breathe enough to say “ow.”

“Coach!” the guy on top of him said. “Hansen’s having some kind of problem!” Evan struggled to take in air, focusing on breathing in and out deeply. This was just a scrimmage, there was no reason for him to be so weak and out of breath. Well, there was, there was his asthma. But no one else on the team had asthma. Evan flushed in embarrassment. That combined with the lack of air brought a tear to the corner of his eye.

The coach walked over. “You need a break, Hansen,” the coach said. “Take five minutes.” The game paused, and Evan walked shamefully across the field to the lockers.

“Just focus on breathing,” he said to himself. He burned with the shame of being the only person having an issue playing an easy scrimmage game. He hoped no one could see him crying. He ran the rest of the way into the lockers room as the game continued. The guy who had tackeld him was trying to follow. “Go away,” Evan gasped, but he didn’t have enough air for the other guy to hear him. He heard screaming?

“Get away, freak!” Someone yelled. Evan had collapsed on a bench in the locker room by now, and couldn't see what was going on outside. He stared at the ground and breathed slowly and deeply, but shuddering with every breath. Someone walked into the locker room, but it wasn’t the guy who’d knocked Evan down. Evan squeezed his eyes shut to hold back the tears.

“Are you okay?” The person was touching Evan’s shoulder. Evan knew his face got all red and blotchy when he cried. The embarrassment of knowing that it was obvious he was crying made him cry harder.

“Dude, it’s okay,” the person said. He sat down on the bench next to Evan. “Asthma?” He asked.

“Yeh,” Evan breathed. He sniffled and tried to hold in his tears. Football players don’t cry, he told himself.

“That fucking sucks, man,” the guy said. He brushed a strand of hair out of his face, then expertly pulled it back into the rest of his bun. He stuck out a hand. “The name’s Connor Murphy,” he said. “Head cheerleader. You’re Evan Hansen, of course. Everybody knows the guy who became captain despite dropping the ball at tryouts.”

Evan shrank further into himself. “My hands were all sweaty,” he said. “I’m sorry, I couldn't hold onto the ball.”

“Don’t apologize to me,” Connor laughed. “Here. Let’s get you some cold water. It’ll clear up your face.” Connor’s face went a little dark, and a little sad. “Then no one will know you’ve been crying,” Connor said. “Trust me, I can make it work. I’ve done it before.”

Evan sniffled. “Okay,” he said. His arm felt numb.


	2. Chapter 2

Connor ended up driving Evan to the hospital. “That looks fucking broken, man,” he insisted, belting Evan into the car.

“I told you,” he said after they waited for four hours in urgent care for the X-ray.

“I’m sorry,” Evan said.

“Psh,” Connor scoffed. “You didn’t break it. And if you think you’re wasting my time, you’re not. I’m just high enough to go all out to get a cute boy to notice me.”

“Oh,” Evan said. You’re high? He thought. “You’re flirting with the nurse?” He asked.

“No,” Connor said, smacking Evan’s arm.

“Ow,” Evan winced.”

“Sorry. No, stupid, I’m flirting with you,” Connor smiled. He’d taken his hair out of the bun, and it radiated luxuriously down to his shoulders. Evan blushed.

“Oh. Um,” Evan said. “I’m sorry.”

“You say that a lot,” Connor said. He shrugged, and leaned on Evan’s good arm. “I’m only teasing,” he said. Evan breathed a quiet sigh of relief. Connor was, obviously, gorgeous, but Evan wasn’t sure he could handle a relationship. But he would have liked it if he—no. Bad train of thought.

“You’re so buff,” Connor said, squeezing one of Evan’s biceps. Evan blushed. The doctor came in with the materials to make the cast, and Connor glared at the doctor as he was made to step away from Evan. Evan could barely meet Connor’s eyes.

“Why are you wearing a skirt?” The doctor sniffed distastefully at Connor. Connor flipped her off.

“Because I’m fucking head cheerleader,” he said. The doctor made a nurse escort Connor out of the room. Evan found Connor sitting in the waiting room on his phone. Connor had hiked up the skirt so that a LOT of his thigh was revealed. Evan tried to look away.

“No, Mom, I’m out with a friend,” Connor said into the phone. He sounded angry. Evan adjusted his varsity jacket on his good shoulder. “I’m just out, okay? God, I don’t want to hear that you’re fucking happy for me for having friends! Shut up!” Connor angrily hung up. A nurse made eyebrows at Evan indicating “Get that swearing kid out of here or else.”

Evan and Connor walked out to the car. “Drive me home?” Evan asked.

“Home? Football practice is probably still going. Let’s do something fun,” Connor said, driving out of the hospital parking lot. “It’s still daylight. Do you like ice cream?”


	3. Chapter 3

“Just pick a fucking ice cream flavor,” Connor groaned. It was nice and cool inside A La Mode.

“I…I’m sorry, I don’t have any money,” Evan said. “You get something, I’ll just—“

“Fuck it. He’s having chocolate. Do you have weed flavor?” Connor threw some crumbled bills on the counter.

“Connor,” Evan said, a little shocked. Connor sighed. The person behind the counter glared.

“Fine. Chocolate for me too.” And a few minutes later, they drove off and arrived at the orchard. Connor was too busy trying to make sexual eye contact with Evan as he licked the last of his ice cream out of the cone to notice it was closed, at first.

“Connor? It’s closed down,” Evan said. He held his finished ice cream cup in his hand, unsure of where to throw it out and unwilling to put it down in case Connor thought he was littering. Connor glanced up.

“What? Oh, FUCK!” Connor said. He slammed the horn a couple times, as if that would do anything. “Come on freak, we’re hopping the fence,” he said.

“But I don’t—“ Evan started.

“Oh right! Your arm,” Connor said. “I’ll hop the fence and let you in.”

“Is that legal?” Evan asked. He still held the cup. Connor took it from him, crunched it, and threw it into the backseat.

“Sure it is,” he said. Connor climbed over the fence. Evan could see way too much skin from underneath the pink cheerleader skirt. He blushed, and looked away. True to his word, Connor opened up the fence so Evan could come in. He reached into a pocket (that skirt has pockets? Evan marveled) and pulled out a joint.

“Um…” Evan said. “Would you…um…I’m sorry.”

“What, you’re uncomfortable?” Connor asked. “Well, fuck.” He put his lighter and the joint back in the pocket.

“Um.” Evan said.

“What now?” Connor sighed.

“Why do you swear so much?” Evan asked hesitantly. They began walking through the orchard.

“There’s a field this way,” Connor said. “I think. What?”

“Why do you swear so much?” Evan asked again, slightly more confidently. Connor stared at him. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Evan said.

“I dunno,” Connor said. “You don’t like it?”

“You don’t have to stop, I’m sorry, I was just curious—“ Evan said.

“No, I’ll try and cut down on it when you’re in earshot,” Connor said. Evan realized that not smoking and not swearing were just things Connor was doing as a courtesy to Evan, that he wasn’t stopping forever. Evan didn't know how he felt about that. Guilty, mostly, for being such a burden to the guy who drove him to the hospital.

“I’m sorry,” Evan continued, weakly.

“Here!” Connor said. They entered an open field, framed with trees. “Here’s a good spot. Let’s sit.” Evan sat, and Connor did too. They talked, for a little, but mostly sat in silence. It was good silence, though. Evan wondered why he’d never talked to Connor before. Maybe it was the cheerleader’s reputation, but Evan realized that he and Connor would have made such good friends. Especially last year, when Evan had no friends. No one to talk to when he was sad, which seemed to be more and more often as the year went on. Eventually, Evan noticed that Connor was shivering.

“If you’re cold, we can go back,” Evan suggested. Connor looked right into Evan’s eyes. God, Connor has such gorgeous eyes, Evan thought.

“You kidding, freak? Gimme your jacket,” Connor said. God. Evan has such gorgeous eyes, Connor thought. He grabbed the varsity jacket and wrapped it around himself. Connor watched Evan stare out over the meadow. The sun shone on Evan’s face, and his cute little freckles were dimly visible. The jacket smelled like Evan, like a workout on the field. Connor melted a little inside. This boy was CUTE. Super buff, but cute. Evan adjusted his position to move weight off his cast.

“Lean on me,” Connor said. Evan didn’t, but he smiled and sang softly.

“When you’re not strong,” Evan crooned. He had a beautiful singing voice.

“And I’ll be your friend,” Connor echoed. Evan laughed. “I’m gonna sign your cast,” Connor said, “so we can both pretend we have friends.” He grabbed the cast and pulled a sharpie out of his skirt pocket.

“Ow,” Evan winced. Connor silently wrote his name in big letters across the entire length of Evan’s forearm.

“There you go,” he said. Evan looked at it and smiled.

“Why is it so big?” he asked.

“There’s something bigger if you want it,” Connor smirked, but when he saw the look on Evan’s face he quickly backed off. “I mean, so that no one else can write on it. Just me. Cute girls are gonna have to compete if they want to date you.”

“No one wants to date me,” Evan said, sadly. “And…I was going to say I have friends, but…I guess I…and I don’t even like girls.” Connor’s heart did a tapdance. He reached for Evan’s shoulder, but Evan pulled away, withdrawing into himself.

“You got a friend now, freak,” Connor said, pulling his arm back. They sat a while and enjoyed the sun until it set behind the leafy canopy.


	4. Chapter 4

Evan went home to his house, and Connor wandered around aimlessly, never really going home. Evan knew nothing of this, as he gently steered his mom to a subject other than “how did you break your arm, I don’t want you playing football” (and maybe, the suggestion that he would never be as good as the other players because of his asthma, and maybe he should just quit and work on his college scholarship essays, and maybe—) but, Evan did his best to ignore that train of thought and go to sleep. He curled up in stripy bedsheets with a stuffed bear and fell into a deep, peaceful sleep.

Evan had a weird dream. It was in bright, vibrant color. Evan would have been embarrassed to admit that it involved Connor wearing even less clothing than he had been earlier, but the dream ended when someone emerged from nowhere to stab Connor through the heart. Connor collapsed, bleeding everywhere, and Evan woke up in a cold sweat. It took him a very long time to fall back asleep.

In the Murphy household, there was almost a panic. Connor’s mom was on the verge of calling the cops, calling 911, calling SOMEONE to find her son. Connor’s father and sister went about their evenings as usual.

“Mom, he left practice early to chase down the quarterback or something,” Zoe snapped. “I don’t know where he is! Like he ever comes home anymore.”

“I won’t have you talking that way about him,” Cynthia said half heartedly, but she thought privately that Zoe was jealous of her brother. She had begged him to come to watch her try out for the cheer team. He eventually did, and laughed at her, embarrassing her when she missed a step or fumbled a jump. “I could do better than that,” Connor had said. Reports of what happened next varied. Some said that Connor stood, and nonchalantly backflipped down the bleachers. Some said that he just came down and did Zoe’s routine perfectly. Some said that he flipped Zoe off, and that the manager was so taken with his good looks she hired him on the spot. (It was a little known fact that if the manager, Alana Beck, were to be awestruck by the good looks of anyone, it would have been Zoe.) Whatever happened, Zoe and Connor both made the team, and Connor was made head cheerleader.

Zoe stomped up to her room. Cynthia sadly put down the phone and asked her husband to sit with her, and at least pretend he cared for his son. Zoe locked her doors and windows so that if Connor returned, he couldn’t threaten her again. She fell asleep.

Zoe had a weird dream. It was in black and white. She was the queen of a distant kingdom, and a horrible villain had been recently slain by the great hero. There was a brief funeral, which Zoe was required to attend, as queen. She gazed down into the grave and saw Connor’s body. In the dream, this was expected, but Zoe would wake up to find this dream element as a sort-of nightmare. No one came to the funeral but Zoe, and the great hero. Zoe gave the orders that no one in the kingdom would light candles to remember the evil deeds of the villain, and turned to thank the great hero. She thought it was Evan, but when the armor clad figure turned to face her, Zoe stared into the eyes of Alana Beck. Zoe woke up the next morning, unsure of how she felt about the dream. She forgot it before she even made it down to breakfast.

Connor had held onto Evan’s varsity jacket, so he had at least some protection from the cold. He sat on the hood of his car, watching cars zoom by, and smoked. He didn’t want to go home and have to deal with his family, and his sister. Sometimes he wished that he could talk to her, and tell her how he felt and what he thought about everything, but this was not one of those times. Connor wondered how easy it would be to jump into the street in front of a car. By the time he’d worked up enough energy to stand, no more cars were coming by. Connor curled up in the backseat of his car and passed out.

Connor had a weird dream. First, he saw bright flashes of memory, things that had happened that day. Trees, Evan’s face, the sunlight. Then everything went black. Connor slept through first period, then decided not to bother coming to school until it was time for cheer practice.


	5. Chapter 5

“Hansen! That’s enough! You’re off your game today,” The coach yelled, walking over to wear Evan sat in the grass, breathing heavily. Evan briefly made eye contact with Connor, who was watching from across the field. Connor waved. Evan blushed. “That’s enough of that,” the coach muttered. “MURPHY! GET OFF THE FIELD!” Connor lazily flipped off the coach. “MURPHY!” The coach bellowed back.

That day, the rule was set. Alana worried that there could have been some correlation versus causation confusion, but the coach was firm. Having the head cheerleader nearby distracted the football captain, so no more cheer practice near football practice. Alana sighed, and immediately booked the field for her cheer team. The coach angrily tried to find a nearby park and bus system.

Alana was the manager of the cheer team, and though she hated to admit it, Connor was head cheerleader. She had been shocked when she’d seen him at tryouts…she couldn’t even describe how GOOD he was. Zoe eventually told her that they’d taken gymnastics together as little kids, and Alana pretended to want more information in order to talk to Zoe for longer. Zoe was the most beautiful…girl? Woman? Teenager? Human? That Alana had ever seen. Alana would come to cheer practice, supposedly to have a nice distraction-free homework space, but really to watch Zoe. 

Hm. That was odd. Connor never really participated in practices. He was more of a yelling from the sidelines, criticizing sort of guy. But he wasn’t screaming at the other cheer members today. He was hunched into himself. Alana noticed that he had been like this since the coach relocated the football team, specifically Evan Hansen, away from cheer. Alana made a note: cheer must practice in sight of football, even if football can’t practice in sight of cheer. She could organize this, she knew. She always could. She took a pencil from behind her ear and began writing.

Later, Connor and Evan hung out on the field. Evan was incredibly sweaty, and once Connor nudged him a little, incredibly willing to discuss the finer points of football and strategy. God, it was hot when he got excited about football. Connor wore Evan’s jacket, even though it was hotter than hell outside. Stupid unpredictable weather. Fuck weather. Evan noticed the jacket, but didn’t ask for it back. Connor wondered if he SHOULD give it back.

“We’re not going to do that thing, y’know,” Connor said, out of nowhere.

“What? I—what thing?” Evan was thrown off track, distracted by his mental outline of the perfect play. He scratched his ear with the non-broken arm, and Connor died internally. God, this kid was fucking adorable.

“The quarterback and head cheerleader have sex thing,” Connor said. Evan blushed so red that Connor wished he could take it back, if only to say it again and watch Evan’s face again. Was Evan really this embarrassed to talk about sex?

“Fine. Um, yeah! Fine by me,” Evan said, then hesitantly continuing to talk about football. Connor nursed a tiny crush and continued to die inside. Zoe spotted them on the field before she headed home. She glared at her brother, but let her eyes linger on Evan. He certainly was big, and buff. He was the guy that all the cheerleaders had a crush on, the exact guy that Zoe should have a crush on. She told herself that she liked him, and that she was like everybody else for doing so. Some nagging part of her remembered seeing Alana in her dream, but the memory never hit her thoughts. Zoe shrugged it off and walked away.


End file.
